―Gee, it‘s pretty crowded with just the two of us. Where‘s she going to sleep?‖ ―Oh, that‘s no problem. She can sleep in my bed, with me.‖ ―Well, okay, ‖said Annie. ―It‘s up to you.‖
―Great! ‖ answered Rosa. ―She‘s coming tomorrow.‖
Two weeks later, the cousin was still with them. Since she did not bring enough money, Rosa paid for her meal. Rosa missed many of her classes so that she could help her cousin find her way around.
Rosa never complained about any of this to Annie, but Annie decided to speak to her friend.
―Rosa,‖ she said. ―I know it‘s none of my business. But I don‘t like to see you being treated this way. It‘s not fair of your cousin to take advantage of you, using your time and your money like this. And how do you ever get any sleep, anyway? I think you should tell her you have your own life to live. After all, she‘s only your second cousin.‖
Rosa was surprised. She answered, ―Oh, the bed doesn‘t bother me! It reminds me of sleeping with my sister as a child. You‘re right, though, about my schoolwork. I know I‘m missing too many classes. But family comes first. I just couldn‘t leave my cousin here by herself. ‖
Even after their conversation, Annie still could not understand her friend. Before her cousin arrived, Rosa had always seemed like such an independent, responsible person, who never missed a class. Annie just could not understand why she had changed. Questions:
1) Why was Annie confused?
2) Why did Rosa continue to help her cousin?
3) Do you think Rosa‘s and Annie‘s ideas are typical of their culture?
4) Would you do the same for your second cousin as Rosa did? Why or why not?
3. Read the following case ( from Zanger, 1985) and answer the questions that follow. Eva came to the United States from Peru to study at an American college. She wanted to live with an American family to find out more about the American way of life. And she wanted to improve her English.
The foreign student office of her college found the Larsen family for Eva to live with. Eva spoke with Mrs. Larsen on the telephone. She sounded very warm and friendly to Eva. She told Eva she could move in the next day. Eva was very happy about it.
Eva arrived the next day with all her luggage. She was excited to meet the Larsens. She rang the doorbell.
A tall, blond woman answered the door with a big smile on her face. She said, ―Oh, you must be Eva! I‘m so glad you‘re here! Let me help you with your bags. Come on in. I‘m Hilda Larsen.‖ She took one of Eva‘s bags into the house.
When they got inside, Mrs. Larsen put the bag down and stood across from Eva, about 3 feet away. She crossed her arms in front of her and asked Eva, ―Tell me about your trip. I‘d love to go to Peru someday.‖
Just then, her teenaged son walked in, hands in his pockets, ―Jimmy, Meet Eva.
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Maybe she can help you with your Spanish this semester,‖ said his mother.
Jimmy Said, ―Hi, glad to meet you.‖ His hands stayed in his pockets while he nodded his head.
Eva didn‘t know what to do with her hands. She felt uncomfortable. But she smiled and said, ―Hi, Nice to meet you.‖
The Larsens showed Eva her new room. Then they left her alone to unpack. Eva felt a little disappointed, but she didn‘t know exactly why. She thought Mrs. Larsen seemed so friendly on the phone. But now she wasn‘t sure. Jimmy also seemed a little cold, but maybe he was just shy.
Eva tried to decide what was wrong. She thought to herself: If an American girl came to stay with me in Peru, she would get a warm welcome than that. My mother would give her a big kiss, instead of just standing there, on the other side of just standing there, on the other side of the room. And my brother would give her a proper greeting. Well, people told me that Americans are cold. I guess they‘re right. Questions:
1) How did Mrs. Larsen and Jimmy greet Eva respectively? 2) Why did Eva feel that the Larsens were cold?
3) If you were Eva, would you think that Mrs. Larsen was cold? Why or why not?
4. Read the following case (from Zanger, 1985) and try to define some different cultural assumptions about men and women. A cultural assumption, shared by the people of a culture, is a belief about the way the world works, the way to understand reality.
Kevin was leaving work one Friday, when he stopped to talk t Blanca, a new worker. On Wednesday, they had talked at lunch. She had told him that she had just come from the Dominican Republic two months before. Kevin liked her.
―So, Blanca, what are your plans for the weekend?‖ asked Kevin.
―Oh, hi. Kevin,‖ Blanca smiled. ―I have to go shopping with my cousin for a winter coat.‖
―Tonight some of us from work are going out to a place called ?The Blue Hat‘ for beers and something to eat. Would you like to come? I could pick you up at eight if you tell me where you live.‖
―Okay, Kevin. That sounds nice. I hope it‘s O.K. if I bring my little sister along.‖
―As your chaperone ? ‖ laughed Kevin, making a joke.
―That‘s right,‖ said Blanca. ―I guess you know something about the Dominican culture. It‘s the only way my parents will let me go.‖
―Are you serious?‖ Kevin stared at her. ―Well, I‘ll be there at eight.‖
When Kevin, Blanca, and her sister arrived at ―The Blue Hat ‖, they sat down with Kevin‘s friends, who were already eating. A waiter came and asked, ―What would you like to have? And shall I put this all on one check or will you all pay separately?‖
―Separate checks, please,‖ answered Kevin. ―I‘ll have a hamburger and French fries and a beer, please. Blanca?‖
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Blanca opened her purse under the table. Then she whispered something to her sister in Spanish. She looked at the waiter and said, ―My sister and I aren‘t hungry. A coke and a beer, please.‖ Questions:
1) Why did Blanca bring along her little sister? 2) Why was Kevin surprised?
3) Why did Kevin say, ―Separate checks, please‖? 4) Why did Blanca say she wasn‘t hungry?
三、思考题
1. Study the following case story (from Blanton and Lee, 1999) and find out what values guide the different behaviors of the two characters.
My best friend called late one night to tell me she was leaving her husband. Her mind was made up-16 long years of marriage, children—and she was leaving.
My friend and I and both our husbands, like a majority of our friends, are Nigerians. While we‘ve lived in the United States for most of our adulthood and for all intents and purposes live like Americans, we identify closely with our traditional Ibo culture.
―Why? What happened?‖ I asked.
―Nothing, really,‖ she answered, ―nothing I can put my finger on.‖
―Is he having an affair? Is he involved with someone else?‖ He didn‘t strike me as the cheating type, but why else would she be leaving?
―No, nothing like that.‖
―Did he beat you up?‖ Women don‘t end marriages for nothing.
―It‘s nothing in particular.‖ She spoke haltingly, weighing every word. ―All I know is that I‘ve been very unhappy lately.‖
―Are you having an affair?‖
―No! Are you crazy? How can you even ask me that?‖ She laughed out loud. She has everything any Ibo woman would want: a professional husband (from a good family back home ) with a good income, who allows her to pursue her own career; not one, not two, but three sons and a daughter; a huge house in the suburbs.
―What about the children?‖ I heard her muffled sobs and sensed her struggle to regain composure. ―They‘ll stay with their father,‖ she said. She was no right to the Ibo tradition, American laws or not.
―How can you do this to yourself?‖ I lost all control. ―Have you gone mad?‖ I need to try to find happiness. I really thought that you, of all people, would understand,‖ she said coldly, hanging up before I could reply.
2. When you say ―my family ‖, what members do you usually include? What do you think the answer of an American and a Korean will be respectively to this question?
3. Think about the following questions.
1) How do you think interpersonal relationships affect communication?
2) Are there any changes in the Chinese family structure now? If yes, what changes? 3) What are the differences in the concepts of family between the Chinese and
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American cultures?
4) How are friends important to you? And why?
5) What are the differences in the concepts of friends between the Chinese and American cultures?
4. Read the following passage and think about the questions.
Katherine came to Beijing in 1998 and found a job as an English teacher in a foreign language institute. Soon after her classes began, she found that her students showed no interest in her teaching and quite a few of them avoided to ask the Director, Prof. Wang, for help. One day, she came to the Director and told him that she would like to talk to him about her problem. The director looked at his timetable and asked if they could meet at ten o‘clock on Thursday morning and she agreed.
On Thursday she arrived at the Director‘s office at the exact time of their appointment when she found that Prof. Wang was talking with another teacher in Chinese. Seeing that she had come, Prof. Wang smiled to gesture a seat and asked her to sit down. She got herself seated, and the professor excused himself and carried on the talk with the teacher. About five minutes later, he concluded his talk and made a profound apology before he began to talk with Katherine. The Director showed great concern and asked her what the problems was. Just as she was specifying her problem, another Chinese teacher came in, with a form that apparently needed signature of the Director. The Director smiled an apology to Katherine again and turned to talk with that teacher, also in Chinese. Katherine became impatient, wondering why their talk should be interrupted since they had already made an appointment. She was so upset and got choked by their talking in Chinese in front of her that she became quite angry. Although their talk continued, she was apparently unhappy about what had happened. 1). How can you explain the Director‘s behavior to Katherine?
2). According to Katherine, what kind of rules did the Director violate in their communication?
5. Read the following passage and think about the questions.
A Canadian colleague and I traveled to Guilin with our admirable guide Heping Liu in very hot weather. Sight-seeing is thirsty business, we did not trust the water, and delighted in the excellent beer which we politely offered Heping. Heping refused, we said nothing and drank our beer, while poor Heping watched. One day Heping must have been desperate because he accepted the first offer. Only when I saw that Heping in fact liked beer very much did it then occur to me to ask him whether maybe in Chinese it was not polite to accept a first offer.
Indeed, it is not and Heping was being modest, polite and well behaved and had every intention of accepting the beer at the second or third offer. But Heping had not figured on North American rules which firmly say that you do not push alcoholic beverages on anyone. A person may not drink for religious reasons, he may be a reformed alcoholic, he may be allergic. Whatever the reason behind the rule, you do not insist on offering alcohol. So unconscious and so strong are our communication rules that we equally politely never made a second offer of beer to Heping who
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