this.\“不成，”妈妈黯然神伤地说。“过去我总是讲，只要我下决心，什么事都能干成。现在我仍然认为大多数的事我都能做。但打字这件事我干不了。”
I felt helpless and out of place. 我感到无能为力，而且十分尴尬。
At age 16 I still assumed Mother could do anything. 我虽然十六岁了，但仍然以为妈妈什么都能干。
Some years before, when we sold our ranch and moved to town, Mother had decided to open a day nursery. 几年前，当我们卖掉农场，搬到城里住的时候，妈妈决定开办日托所。
She had had no training, but that didn't stand in her way. 她过去没有受过这方面的训练，但这并不能阻碍她。 She sent away for correspondence courses in child care, did the lessons and in six months formally qualified herself for the task. 她写信要求参加幼托函授课程，学习了六个月就正式获得从事这项工作的资格。
It wasn't long before she had a full enrollment and a waiting list. I accepted all this as a perfectly normal instance of Mother's ability.不久她的日托所招生额满，而且还有不少小孩登记等着入托呢。我觉得凭妈妈的能力，办成这一切是理所当然的。
But neither the nursery nor the motel my parents bought later had provided enough income to send my sister and me to college. 然而，无论是托儿所或是我父母后来购买的汽车旅馆都不能提供足够的收入供我妹妹和我上大学。 In two years I would be ready for college. In three more my sister would want to go. 两年后就该是我上大学的时候了。再过三年，妹妹也要上了。
Time was running out, and Mother was frantic for ways to save money. 时间一天天过去，妈妈拼命想办法积蓄钱。 It was clear that Dad could do no more than he was doing already——farming 80 acres in addition to holding a full-time job.很清楚，爸爸已尽了最大努力--除了一份全日工作之外，还耕种了八十英亩地。
A few months after we'd sold the motel, Mother arrived home with a use typewriter. 我们卖了汽车旅馆没几个月，妈妈搬回来一台旧打字机。
It skipped between certain letters and the keyboard was soft. 这架打字机有时会跳字，键盘也很松。
At dinner that night I pronounced the machine a \那天吃晚饭时，我把这台机器说成是“废物一件”。 \“我们只买得起这样旧的，”妈妈说。“学打字用是够可以的了。”
And from that day on, as soon as the table was cleared and the dishes were done, Mother would disappear into her sewing room to practice. 从那天起，餐桌一收拾，盘子一洗，妈妈马上到她的缝纫间去练习。
The slow tap, tap, tap went on some nights until midnight.有几天，那缓慢的嗒、嗒、嗒的声音一直持续到午夜。 It was nearly Christmas when I heard Mother got a job at the radio station. I was not the least but surprised, or impressed. But she was ecstatic. 临近圣诞节的时候，我听说妈妈在电台找到一份工作。我一点也不惊奇，也不觉得有什么特别，但妈妈却欣喜万分。
Monday, after her first day at work, I could see that the excitement was gone. 星期一，妈妈第一天上班回来，我发觉妈
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妈的高兴劲儿已经烟消云散。
Mother looked tired and drawn. I responded by ignoring her.妈妈绷着脸，看上去很疲劳，我没对她作任何表示。 Tuesday, Dad made dinner and cleaned the kitchen. Mother stayed in her sewing room, practicing. \asked Dad. 星期二，爸爸做晚饭，收拾厨房。妈妈呆在缝纫间练习打字。“妈妈还好吗?”我问爸爸。
\a bit more.\“妈妈打字碰到点困难，”他说，“她需要练习。我想，如果我们在家里多帮一点忙，她会很感激的。” \“我已经做得不少了，”我马上警觉起来，说道。
\so you can go to college.\“我知道你做得不少，”爸爸心平气和地说。“说不定你还得再多干一点。你要记住，她现在工作主要是为了能供你上大学。”
I honestly didn't care. I wished she would just forget the whole thing. 老实说，上不上大学我并不在乎。我真希望妈妈一点也不要把这事放在心上。
My shock and embarrassment at finding Mother in tears on Wednesday was a perfect index of how little I understood the pressures on her. 星期三，当发现妈妈哭时我所感到的震惊和窘迫，完全表明了我对妈妈所承受的压力是多么的不理解。
Sitting beside her on the couch, I began very slowly to understand.我坐在她的身旁，慢慢开始理解了。 \“我想我们都不免有失败的时候，”妈妈平静地说。
I could sense her pain and the tension of holding back the strong emotions that were interrupted by my arrival. 我可以感觉到她的痛苦，也感觉到她在极力抑制着由于我闯进来而被打断的强烈情感的发泄。
Suddenly, something inside me turned. I reached out and put my arms around her.突然，我心里一酸，伸开双臂，把妈妈搂在怀里。
She broke then. She put her face against my shoulder and sobbed. 妈妈再也控制不住了。她把脸贴着我的肩膀，抽泣着。 I help her close and didn't try to talk. I knew I was doing what I should, what I could, and that it was enough. 我紧紧抱着她，没有说话。我明白我是在做我应该做的和我所能做的，这就够了。
In that moment, feeling Mother's back racked with emotion, I understood for the first time her vulnerability. 妈妈非常激动，我感到她的背在颤抖。就在那一时刻，我第一次明白妈妈也有弱点。
She was still my mother, but she was something more: a person like me, capable of fear and hurt and failure. 她还是我的妈妈，但又不仅如此：她和我一样也是一个普通的人，会害怕，会受到伤害，会遭遇失败。
I could feel her pain as she must have felt mine on a thousand occasions when I had sought comfort in her arms.我感觉到她的痛苦，就像我千百次在她怀里寻求安慰时，她感到我的痛苦一样。
A week later Mother took a job selling dry goods at half the salary the radio station had offered. 一周过后，妈妈找到一个卖纺织品的工作，工资只有原先电台的一半。
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\“这是一个我能胜任的工作，”她简单地说道。
But the evening practice sessions on the old green typewriter continued. 但在晚上，她继续在那台绿色的旧打字机上练习。
I had a very different feeling now when I passed her door at night and heard her tapping away. 那时，每当我在夜晚走过她的房门前，听着她那一刻不停的嗒、嗒的打字声时，我的感情与过去迥然不同了。
I knew there was something more going on in there than a woman learning to type.我深知，在那个房间里进行着的绝不仅仅是一个妇女在学习打字。
When I left for college two years later, Mother had an office job with better pay and more responsibility. 两年后我上大学时，妈妈找到一份薪金比原来高但责任也比原来重的办公室工作。
I have to believe that in some strange way she learned as much from her moment of defeat as I did, because several years later, when I had finished school and proudly accepted a job as a newspaper reporter, she had already been a journalist with our hometown paper for six months.使我不得不相信的是，妈妈不可思议地从失败中学到的东西竟与我所学到的一样多。因为几年后，我大学毕业、自豪地受聘担任报纸记者时，她已在我们家乡的报社里当了六个月的记者了。 The old green typewriter sits in my office now, unrepaired. 那台绿色旧打字机现在放在我的办公室里，至今没有修理过。
It is a memento, but what it recalls for me is not quite what if recalled for Mother. 它是一件纪念品。但它所勾起的我的回忆与妈妈的不尽相同。
When I'm having trouble with a story and think about giving up or when I start to feel sorry for myself and think things should be easier for me, I roll a piece of paper into that cranky old machine and type, word by painful word, just the way mother did. What I remember then is not her failure, but her courage, the courage to go ahead.每当我写文章遇到困难想打退堂鼓时，或是自叹不走运时，我就往那台破旧的打字机里卷进一张纸，像妈妈当年一样，一个字一个字地吃力地打着。这时，我回忆起的不是妈妈的失败，而是她的勇气，她那一往无前的勇气。 It's the best memento anyone ever gave me. 这台打字机是我一生中得到的最好的纪念品。
NEW WORDS anticipation n. expectation anticipate vt.期望 issue
n. 发行物（刊物的）一期 tuck
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vt. put or push into a desired convenient position so as to hold tightly; draw together into a small space 塞（进）；卷（起） bound
vi. move along quickly by jumping or leaping movements 跳跃 flip
v. turn or move quickly or with a jerk tight
a. drawn, fixed or fastened together firmly 紧的，牢的 ad. firmly, closely couch
n. a long comfortable seat with a back and arms on which more than one person may sit; sofa 长沙发椅 approach
v. come near or nearer(to) cautiously
ad. very carefully 细心地，谨慎地
cautious a.谨慎的，小心的 type
vt. write (sth.) with a typewriter line
n. a row of words in a poem; a row of words on a page of writing or in print （诗、文的）一行 helpless
a. unable to look after oneself or take action to help others, powerless assume
vt. take as true without actual proof; suppose 假设，主观认为 ranch
n. a very large farm for raising horses, cattle or sheep 大牧场，大农场 nursery
n. a place where small children are temporarily cared for 托儿所 day nursery
n. a place where small children are cared for during the day training
n. the process of training or being trained; instruction
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